Crappy Crackers

It’s just a little over three weeks until Christmas now, which can only mean one thing: we’re so close to eating the best meal of the entire year. And, in the UK at least, that meal is usually accompanied by crackers.

Personally, I love crackers. I love the little bits of junk you always get inside, I love the paper hats that are never quite the right size for your head and – more than anything else – I love the crappy jokes. They’re always the same ones you’ve heard last year, and someone always spoils the punchline before you can get to it, but that’s kinda why they’re so great. They’re reliable. They’re dumb. And, after a long day of arguing about whether the potatoes are overdone, or if your great aunt should be allowed another drink, they give everybody a chance to agree on something.

This clip from QI talks about a theory on why cracker jokes are just so awful:

Essentially, they’re bad so that everybody unites against the joke, instead of the person telling it. Which makes a lot of sense, really. I mean, we all need something to bring the family back together after grandma brings up that thing that happened way back in 2001.

I’ll leave you today with my favourite bad cracker joke: What’s the difference between snowmen and snowwomen? Snowballs. You see? Awful. Now go tell it to everybody you know so that you can spread the Christmas spirit of moaning about things.

Yesterday’s post: The Alternative Christmas Playlist

Tomorrow’s post: Low Cost Christmas Gifts


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